Apr 09
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, “I’m going to mop the floor with your face.”
I said, “You’ll be sorry.”
He said, “Oh, yeah? Why?”
I said, “Well, you won’t be able to get into the corners very well.”
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How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.
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The other day a woman came up to me and said, “Didn’t I see you on television?” I said, “I don’t know. You can’t see out the other way.”
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I was walking down Fifth Avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna return it, rather than keep it, but I thought: “Well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel?” And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
