Einstein, Newton & Pascal are playing hide and seek

Einstein starts counting “1…2…3…” and Pascal immediately runs away to hide. Instead of hiding Newton knees down and draws a square of one meter side length. Then he steps inside of it. Einstein finishes counting and turns around. He instantly yells “Newton I have found you!” But Newton replies: “No, what you see is one Newton over one square meter – so what you have found is one Pascal.”

submitted by AcerTegmentosum
[link] [comment]

David wanted a set of of twins very badly, so he asked his friend Mike for advice.

David asked him, “You have three sets of twins, three! Tell me, what is your secret!”

“I’ll tell you,” replied Mike, “but you gotta do exactly as I say.”

David nodded his head fervently, “Okay, okay, tell me!”

“So, it’s a four day process,” Mike started, “The first day, you gotta play with her vagina, get her real fired up and horny. But stop there, don’t have sex yet.”

David stood in rapt attention.

“The second day, play with it again. Get her really turned on, use toys if you have to.”

David was getting excited

“Now the third day, reallllly turn it up a notch. I’m talking about crank it up to eleven.”

“Yeah! Yeah!” David interjected, “And the fourth day?!”

“The fourth day,” Mike said, “on the fourth day, you call me.”

submitted by templefugate
[link] [comment]